My Small Dog's Workday
- Simply Jelly Jam
- 4 hours ago
- 5 min read
In honor of National Work Like a Dog Day (August 4th).
Inspired by National Work Like a Dog Day on August 4th, I wanted to imagine what a day in my small dog's "work" life is like. This silly exercise made me a little jealous of my dog.
In case it's helpful, below are the main points covered in this post:
About National Work Like a Dog Day
Have you heard the saying "work like a dog" before? The concept of working like a dog is to work hard and put your all into the job with few breaks or distractions.
The phrase is inspired by real world working dogs that labor through physical tasks to get a job done. Police dogs, guard dogs, sled dogs, and sheep dogs are some examples of dogs that work hard for many hours daily. In some cases, their jobs are their livelihoods.
People are encouraged to celebrate National Work Like a Dog Day by being their most productive self during the workday.
Former colleagues used to complain that I "worked like a dog." I was a hard worker that gave my all to the job and rarely took breaks. The way I saw it, I was chosen to do the job set before me. I intended to do my job well.
Since I left my career in higher education, I no longer wish to work hard enough to risk fainting and being rushed to the emergency room. (This happened to me nearly twenty years ago. It scared my coworkers.)
I still work hard and struggle to take breaks nowadays. I do not need to celebrate this day. I need to avoid it by doing the opposite.
Instead, I figured it would be fun to imagine what my small dog's "workday" would be like. I enjoyed imagining what he might consider his daily duties.
The "Workday"
I could have imagined what my large dog's workday would be like. However, Lucy's high energy as a German Shepard mix seemed exhausting to think about. I may still write a post from her perspective one day for fun.
I figured imagining a workday for my small dog, Rascal, would be more entertaining. Imagine the following as described by Rascal, a senior chihuahua mix.
Morning
The morning routine is slow, but consistent. I will wobble my way out of the bedroom after being rudely waken and kicked out by my early bird person who wants to get the day started. This makes me grumpy because the bed is my safe space. Oh, the soft, warm, cozy bed that I was forced to leave prematurely.
I will eventually make my way to the backyard to relieve myself, but I will yell at any neighbor that is outdoors at the same time. "Don't look at me while I'm dropping a deuce and stay away from my house, heathen!"
My family and I will take our morning walk. While I could easily walk two miles, I will ask to be carried for three quarters of the walk to relax while keeping an eye out for stranger danger. Lucy is usually too busy sniffing the weeds. My person seems oblivious to the dangers surrounding her.
After breakfast, I will take a morning nap, unless I must yell at a neighbor for cutting their grass loudly.
Afternoon
If I am lucky, I do not have a pedicure scheduled for me today. Otherwise, I will have to be dragged out of the house to get my nails cut. Why can I not let my nails grow to an outrageously long length? It would make it easier to claw an intruder's eyes out if they attempt to break into my house.
If we head out of the house for a pedicure or other errand, I will remain alert. I will yell at anyone who looks at my family and vehicle.
I will also yell at all dogs except small dogs and black labs. Black labs have a special place in my heart, so they are all saints in my eyes. Otherwise, large dogs are a threat for reasons nobody in my family seems to understand.
At home, I will yell at every small sound I think I hear inside and outside the house. Fly buzzing around? "Stay away from my snacks!" Bird by the window? "Go away, you peeping tom!" People talking in their own driveway the next block over? "Shut up, heathen!"
However, if the puppy next door is crying because their people left to pick up the kids from school, I will cry in solidarity until Lucy comes to comfort me.
When things are quiet, I will try to get a decent afternoon nap.
Evening
Lucy and I will patrol the backyard together starting at 5 P.M. That is when the neighborhood is loudest. Vehicles pulling into driveways and people entering their homes is too risky to ignore. Together, Lucy and I will tell people to "shut up and stay away from our house, heathens!"
Dinner will taste just as amazing as breakfast. It feels great not to have to make my own food. But I will voice my complaint about how long it takes for my person to serve me.
Fortunately, the evening is more chill. I will lounge on the couch after a long, strenuous day of protecting my family. After all, I am the watcher while Lucy is the muscle. Our person is hopeless without us.
Lucy and I will head outside to relieve ourselves one last time. Yes, I will yell at the neighbors who are out and about. They have no reason to be outdoors so late. I will remind them of the curfew I set for them, but they never seem to listen.
Lucy, my jester, will entertain me by attempting to herd toads into the house. She usually fails, but there were a handful of times when she got them indoors before they were rudely thrown out of the house. Lucy just wants a few pets of her own.
I will cuddle and relax with my family before bedtime. Relaxing is the best part of the workday. Sometimes my person laughs at videos too loudly, but I can not fault her for that. I am just happy I kept the family safe.
What's Next?
I hope you enjoyed reading this post as much as I enjoyed writing it! It is a dumb post, but one that allowed me to be silly for fun.
Comment below to share your pet's "workday."
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Thanks, and have a great day!
~Simply Jelly Jam
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